Two Days Later...

Currently Ava's favorite movie is Brave. The main character Merida is a feisty, free spirited, strong willed girl with red curly unkempt hair.  She stands her ground and makes it known that she wants her independence and have control of her future. Ava has Merida's dress, bow and arrows and has even asked if we could dye her hair red (that would be no!) so she settled for Mommy curling her hair instead. I think unbeknowst to her, Ava really relates to Merida. She has that same fierce independence in her and strength that amazes me every day. I believe that strong willed personality is what got Ava through these last 10 months. She has amazed me day after day and I watch in awe as my girl walks, skips, hops, jumps, runs and dances. She has come so far which is why I think I have found these last few days frustrating.

When Ava woke up this morning we found blood on her blankie, the bandage on her right leg had leaked. We needed the bandage changed but knew she was not going to be happy about it.. After explaining to her what we had to do, we tackled the problem head on. With Ava screaming and crying (and David holding her) I managed to get the old bandage off and replace it with clean gauze. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but I hate seeing Ava so upset. Over the past few days Ava as refused to move. I understand she has discomfort and pain but I know it can't be in comparison to her previous surgeries. What happened to my brave girl? She cries, screams "It hurts!" and tells us she's going to lay on the couch forever, I don't think she reacted this bad after her final cast removal. The last 6 months I watched Ava conquer obstacle after obstacle head on. If something at PT was difficult I would catch her practicing it at home while she thought no one was looking. She is my Merida.

I'm having a hard time seeing Ava like this. It is frustrating to have a setback after she has achieved so much, I thought we were past the tough stuff. I know this is our last hurdle but hard to watch after weeks of her being herself again. It's unlike her to be so scared and not fight harder. I know this to shall pass and in no time my girl will be back. Please pray for her healing (and my patience) so our little butterfly can fly high again. I can't wait to have my brave Ava back!